Depression - over dose ...

First things first , this thing is going to come right from my innermost feelings ...

Shun me , ignore me, do what-so-ever , get hurt , hate it...

Off late i have been acting weird , trying to live on my own having the stupid and nonsensical idea in my mind to have no one around me as that's the way i want to live ... All is going haywire , i have never really understand that , i have really lost it...

Ugh ... for many it seem seem that i am in my most selfish gear as possible , maybe self centered mood as possible ... whatever it might seem to be , i have no explanations to it like i have mentioned hate it ...

Hell ! why do i have to sit and watch people make my own unexpected decisions in life , that make no sense whatsoever , why do i even tend to listen to them ?
Why do i have to be truthful , kind , courteous , helpful to all ? .... why cannot i just be selfish , sarcastic , mean , shallow , mean , cruel like all of them ?

P.S- i knew it i should have never taken those damn moral science classes in school ...